Dear viewers, let’s set the scene real quick:
I, your esteemed author, have just sat down to spill his thoughts out onto his laptop after having just taken a fatass rip of wax, with Vampire Weekend on the speaker and Emeril Legasse on the TV.
I am in an uncanny state of mind.
Continue reading High Thoughts: Why Conservatives Aren’t FunnyDid you know that the Detroit Lions have had two winless seasons in their history? We all remember 2008 – Dan Orlovsky running out of the back of the endzone is burned into my mind. But there was a second one back in 1942, when they went 0-11 and set an NFL record for the most giveaways in a single game with 12.
Why do I bring this up? Well, a recent Morning Watch article asserts that these are worse tragedies than the theft of land from indigenous peoples in North America.
Continue reading On Treaties and SafetiesWith recent tea coming from the Morning Watch editorial board comes a set of re-aligned editorial priorities. I had hoped that perhaps this re-shuffle would cause everyone’s favorite College Republicans chairman Sergei Kelley to re-evaluate his blog’s narrative stance and renew his commitment to “objectivity, not subjectivity.” Instead, it appears that Kelley has decided to double down on TMW’s state-of-the-art investigative reporting so as to cover “the basics.”
Editor’s note: You didn’t think we’d give up on this, did you? After a long journey of self-discovery, The Evening Look’s Holmes Hall correspondent O. Justice has prepared another report of the trials and tribulations of finding the elusive Holmes Hall RA.
Yes, my faithful zealots of truth, undying brethren of escalating minor changes into a total war against perceived American values, I am back. Despite numerous attempts of leftist climate activists to shut down my coal-fueled laptop and ethical games journalist to force me to pick female Shepard in Mass Effect 3, I return now from an internship at my Dad’s insurance company to bring you the good word of fair, reasoned, liberal slaying conservative arguments. With that being said, do not believe that I have forgotten my purpose, the drive which brings me strength in a world of diversity castings in Marvel films. Of course, I am to say that all other intentions for life are subservient to a single cause: finding the Holmes Hall RA.
Continue reading Who is the Holmes Hall RA?: The Gingrich CodeHello, devoted readers of The Evening Look. I too, am a reader like yourself–you will notice quickly that I do not have the sharp wit of B. Bunny or the sarcastic introspection of O. Justice. But I do have a story, one that I think will be of interest to you all.
Continue reading Down in the DMs: The Sergei SlideI don’t understand your strategy. You consistently write about various instances of collegiate “leftism” on campus yet, as a self-titled conservative outlet, refuse to comment or criticize anything. It seems almost contradictory that your tagline reads “objectivity, not subjectivity”, yet you blatantly label yourself as the only conservative publication on campus.
Which one is it?
Continue reading Consider That The Morning Watch Might Accidentally Be Furthering Campus LiberalismIf you’re like us, you probably had a pretty chilled out summer. You saw your friends a couple times, and you probably had a fun 4th of July, but you spent a lot of time counting down to important milestones: the end of your shitty job, the day when you could see your faraway college friends for the first time, and of course, the return of lower effort content to The Evening Look. (If you want good content, go read L. Squirrel’s post about the tragedies in Dayton and El Paso.)
Unfortunately, that means the return of us having to engage with others’ content. Our friends at The Morning Watch had themselves a bit of a hot girl summer, posting several times to warn us about the MSU language police’s activities. Though we can’t wait to dive into those, today I wanted to talk about an article that slipped in just as we were going on break: “Where has Western Civilization Gone?”, by Babs Hough.
Hough’s main issue is with MSU’s international teaching programs. Why, she asks, is there no center for studying Western civilization? There’s a center for African studies, Asian studies, even Gender in Global Context. Surely the good ole boys and girls next door can have a place to study great thinkers like Jefferson, Descartes, and Napoleon?
Continue reading The Backstroke of the WestA while ago, I was engaged in a familiar morning ritual – drowning in a mixed-gender harem of proletariat nymphomaniacs, then grabbing a cup of delicious cafeteria coffee and checking The Morning Watch for content. To my surprise, I found a new opinion piece written by one Joseph Gendron entitled “An Open Letter to the New Religion of Intersectionality”. With this piece, Gendron has filled an important need for The Morning Watch – a true manifesto. While there is a mission statement on their website, it reads like ad copy, and as we’ve tried to show through our first set of articles, the pursuit of truth tends to elude them. I feel that this article is a truer expression of the mind of the young conservative found at The Morning Watch. This is conservatism for the TikTok Age, an expression of a group victimized by a huge leftist mob despite everyone around them being conservative.
Continue reading GAMERS RISE UPMy new favorite output from The Morning Watch is “The Watchdog,” a bizarre new series focused on going to minority-themed events and asking stupid questions. Host Sergei Kelley has released two episodes, each of which fits squarely in The Morning Watch’s confusing canon.
Recently, The Morning Watch published “MSU Class: Understanding Patriarchy Assigned, Syllabus Says, “Keep an Open Mind” About Incest”.
I will keep my thoughts brief. Such a piece is deserving of no response – but the very nature of internet communication and incentives in academia necessitates it.
Continue reading Understanding Absolutely Nothing
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