Marvel Is The Opiate of the Masses

As if the Discourse wasn’t rotting our minds enough already, the end of 2020 came with a uniquely eye-rolling cycle: whether or not superhero films are on the level of a collective mythology for our culture. On Friday, December 11th, Alisha Grauso, co-leader of California Freelance Writers United, tweeted the following: “People dismissing comic book movies as ‘kiddie shit’ are completely failing to realize superhero stories are essentially a collective American mythology and the closest thing to a shared lore we have. Eastern European folk tales & Nordic mythology were largely ‘kiddie shit’ too.”

There’s a lot to unpack here, namely the desire to give prestige to a genre and medium originally meant for kids. On the surface level, it’s a heavy-handed film take on the level of a Noah Berlatsky screed, in which someone wants to have their hobby validated to the point of destroying any difference between high and low art. However, I’ve been losing sleep over the deeper meaning of this tweet. Consider for a moment that Grauso is right about superheroes being a collective mythology. In my opinion, this actually has dire implications for our culture.

Queer Eye for the GOP Guy

Sitting in my apartment during this pandemic has caused me to master a shameful lifestyle: watching hours of Netflix with an ever-refilling glass of rosé in hand and Keebler Elfwiches in my fabulous tummy.

Being someone who proudly identifies as “a little gay,” I found myself endlessly consuming one of my favorite shows: Queer Eye.

After this spring’s “Too Hot to Handle” craze, I found myself desiring something more sophisticated and far less straight. Although I spent plenty of time obsessing over Harry and Francesca’s delightfully high-cost dalliance, I found the show had too little actual sex appeal and too many British airheads. Queer Eye is a show dedicated to introducing schlubs to positive lifestyle changes which are acceptable by the standards of the bourgeoisie.

…So perfectly my style.

While binging Queer Eye, I had an epiphany: Conservative culture could really use a makeover. I am gonna give conservatives a good old-fashioned Queer Eye makeover in hopes of making them less cranky, angry, fearful, and racist! Otherwise it might be a little dangerous to introduce them to Karamo.

So here we go, my wonderful Muppets! Time to make Republicans young and old see how much they could improve their own self-worth through a few simple lifestyle changes!

Continue reading Queer Eye for the GOP Guy